Weekly Commentary
Welcome to Week 8 of Weekly Commentary…There was a lull there between weeks but I needed to will my squad back to .500. Now that I’m there after a few nailbiters, I’m ready to type some product…..I never said it’d be consistent, folks. Never once promised such a thing. But we’re both glad something’s up…me writing and you reading…So let’s hold hands and tiptoe through the bullets, shall we?
- I didn’t forget about Joseph Randle. Please understand that I could never forget about that buffoon.
Randle was arrested for stealing Polo underwear and cologne. Would you like to know what the name of the cologne was?
THEN the arrest video leaks and he finds a way to throw a couple of teammates under the bus, mentioning how they’re still free even though they did some stuff too…http://deadspin.com/cowboys-rb-joseph-randle-cracked-jokes-in-jail-asked-f-1652772787
And then he fumbled the ball on Monday Night? If only he held onto the ball with as strong a grip as he held onto that tester cologne and 2pack of underwear…oh well!
- I love how the media tries to praise the new coach when an old coach gets a pink slip via interoffice mail. Jim Harbaugh’s riding the Singletary wave, Trestman’s ridden the Lovie Smith wave for a season and change and Jim Caldwell is currently hanging ten for the Detroit Lions riding Jim Schwartz’s roster from last year. There have been some improvements for this team (especially their record!) but as we saw in London, this team makes it hard for itself. A team with this kind of swarming defense is dancing perilously close to the edge. I’m trying not to lose my head about these Lions because they’re succeeding despite a lot of fumbles, foibles and tomfoolery (AND I own Megatron in a few leagues so I NEED the production) but giving all praise to Jim Caldwell for “righting the ship” and “turning this around” is media spin. This is the talk that gets fans’ hopes up for future seasons and when he faces some true adversity, ol’ Stoneface McGee won’t be able to make it work and next thing we know, he’ll be an analyst on some fifth rate sports show…
- LOL @ the New York Jets display versus Buffalo, on offense of course. Rex and the gang can’t put a functional passing offense on the field for consecutive weeks. No matter how good Geno looked versus the Packers way back when and versus the Patriots that Thursday night, he just doesn’t look like he’s got what it takes to lead New York to the playoffs…hell…he can’t lead them to a winning record. And now with Percy Harvin in the fold, the Jets know how the Seahawks felt those first few weeks of the season. Forcing the issue to your speedy new playmaker isn’t going to help offensive continuity. Decker, Ivory, Amaro and Kerley should be the main focus with Percy sprinkled in as a decoy early to throw teams off but NOPE. Marty Evening-wheg just HAS to make Percy the focal point while New York continues to look like fecal matter. Is there a chance they win another game this season? Their fans sure hope so…
- If I see another person blow their ACL while celebrating a sack….Lamarr Houston, what are you doing? What’s the point of doing a sack celebration when your team’s getting washed like a townhouse in the suburbs? C’mon now. At least Stephen Tulloch got Aaron Rodgers in the 1st half…SMH
- Colt McCoy is lord and host. King of Kings. His rightful place is on the golden throne, decreeing that we’re not worthy of looking him directly in the eye…..wait…Aren’t we supposed to give oral congress to every backup QB to RG3 when they succeed? No? Oh….
- Jerry Jones has a pair on him. Swooping down to the field like a vulture and flapping his leathery wings around, he basically forced Jason Garrett’s hand in putting Tony Romo back into the game. Romo wasn’t healthy after his back injury (DUH!) and lacked zip on his throws upon his return. But he shouldn’t have been in the game to begin with. If Dallas trusted the “process”, they’d hike the ball and hand off to Murray and pass only when they needed to. That’s been the motto so far this season and once the lights are brightest, you revert back to old Cowboy football. SMART. I’m not guaranteeing victory if Brandon Weeden stayed in and just handed the ball off but putting Romo back in endangered him to more danger from the Redskin blitzers and could put him out for MUCH longer. Jerry couldn’t see the forest. He just wanted to chop down that one tree SO BAD…
- J.J. Watt chastising Zach Mettenberger for taking selfies prior to the game reeks of that “get off my lawn and pull up your pants, youngster” guy…I”d give him the sack celebration but the postgame commentary left a sour taste in my mouth…like a swig of hydrogen peroxide.
- Well, well, well…the teardown of the Seahawks doesn’t seem to be working so well, does it? What have I heard the past few weeks? Percy Harvin is cuffing up his teammates and it got swept under the rug, Russell Wilson’s too close to the front office, isn’t “black” enough, and needs to curb his endorsements going forward. ANYONE who has a catch against Richard Sherman is described with Smithsonian detail. Every turnover is a potential backbreaker and every yard any team gains is ONE YARD TOO MANY.
OH NOES, SEATTLE IS IN TROUBLE!
Stop it, cinco. The Seahawks will be fine going forward, barring injury. I think that’s the only thing that could derail this season for them. Injury. The sabotage that’s coming from outside reeks of jealousy and envy. The Seahawks may have a likable figure as the “face” of the franchise (Russell Wilson) but Seattle’s a bunch of heels to everyone else. No one likes Pete Carroll. Marshawn isn’t a teddybear. Sherman’s mouthy ways don’t rub people the right way. The Seahawk style of play (physical, heavy on intimidation on both sides of the ball) is one people don’t always embrace. So anything that looks like a loose thread gets pulled with the force of an Olympic strongman. Leave them alone, media. Because you might be only fueling them for the 2nd half of the season.
- Please get LaDainian off of my night time football analysis shows. PLEASE. If you won’t do it for me, NFL Network, do it for the children! Yeah he knows what he’s talking about when it comes to running the ball but his “insight” on why certain teams are successful make me cringe. I heard him give props to Heath Miller for the Steelers success this season. HEATH MILLER.
- Last but not least…I’m excited by all of this rookie production @ the WR position this season. Kelvin Benjamin, Benjamin Cooks, Martavis Bryant, Donte Moncrief, Mike Evans are just the tip of the iceberg so far…That’s a testament to these players being athletic marvels with rare measurables (speed, catch radius, etc) who are on teams where stats are piling up like junk mail by the front door.
But I’m a little wary for the veteran wide receivers going forward and their salaries going forward. Why?
Let’s look @ running backs for a second. What happened to the value of the veteran running back? Outside of a few outliers, the running back position is expected to be immediately successful VERY early on… and what does that provide an organization? CHEAP LABOR. I hate to look at players that way but trust me, these 32 teams have called them worse…Anyhoo…back to the point…So these teams get cheap labor and veteran running backs, who were once key pieces to any offense are now seen as expendable pieces. And what do expendable pieces get paid? Yeah, you guessed it. Not much. Excuses are made: they don’t speed to the edge, no more burst, can’t pick up the blitz anymore, can’t move the pile, they’re injury prone, etc…and that stops the money from rolling in.
So a league that relies so much on a key position has managed to take the money out of the position. Interesting.
So I worry about wide receivers going forward. Let a couple big name WR’s get paid and then flop while the rookies coming into the league start showing out early. Watch the narrative change. Watch how teams don’t need a clear cut number one receiver anymore because they’ve got 3-4 guys who can do it all…So guys expecting to get paid like Calvin Johnson are going to get paid like Stevie Johnson. And the excuses will start rolling in for them too: can’t get off press, too slow, unreliable hands, always injured, can’t run routes, no speed, not as effective as his younger counterparts…
I don’t claim to know it all like Clarissa nor do I believe this is a conspiracy to keep the QB position swimming in money like Scrooge McDuck..All I ask is that you keep an eye out. That’s all I ask…If I’m right, you know where you read it first.
All right all. It’s been real but I must go and make the most of the day ahead of me.
And like the Lakers season (YES, ALREADY!)
I AM DONE.
The Commish
Another week, another slew of NFL games that deserve commentary for stuff on and off the field….Let’s dive right in, shall we?
- These Thursday Night games have to go. Week 1 was interesting for a half but since then? Blowouts. Nothing but blowouts. These matchups aren’t competitive! And I know these look cool on paper, being divisional matchups and all but once one team gets up two touchdowns, there are no adjustments made or not enough made..I say they abolish the Thursday night games and go back to how it used to be…Give us our games on Sunday and Monday from Week 1 till Thanksgiving….and then play Thursday games from Thanksgiving on. I don’t need 12 weeks of subpar weeknight football and I don’t want to worry about volatile fantasy football results either …If I wanted to see terrible team sports on weeknight, the Knicks season is forthcoming….
- Should the Niners have kept Alex Smith? Short answer? No. Longer answer? Kaepernick may get a little squirrelly with the ball sometime but Alex Smith couldn’t beat the Packers like Colin did in the playoffs. Smith versus the Seahawk defense? No thank you. Alex looks good with top flight talent around him but if it’s all on his shoulders to move the ball down the field, he’s not capable of getting the job done…Media types? Stop the madness. Just Alex Smith has one good game on national TV, you want to crown him as lord and host?
- Charlotte Lucas of Lucas Oil rants about minorities on her Facebook page…SMH…http://www.theindychannel.com/news/call-6-investigators/charlotte-lucas-facebook-rant-about-minorities-raises-eyebrows
- I watched that Patriot blitzkrieg of the Bengals and I came away more upset at Marvin Lewis’s team. Yes, Belichick had his guys come out with intensity and New England got up quick on Cincinnati but Marvin Lewis HAS to be better prepared for that. He has to know…that to be taken seriously as a contender in the league…to be considered favorites in the AFC North…they had to put the Patriots back on the mat. They had the talent on both sides of the ball and Hue Jackson had some calls at the ready for the Pats and their vaunted secondary. They were running the ball at a decent clip as well but when they had some spots to take shots, the gun backfired…the clip fell out…or their aim was faulty. And I can’t help but keep the blame finger pointed @ Marvin. Personnel (Gresham, ugh…) and gameplan (why no aggressive gameplan from the start on defense?) are two things he’s in charge of and he let Bill Belichick’s team Electric Slide up and down the field…SMH
- The Tennessee Titans have got to be kidding me with that performance versus the Browns. Up 25 and they lost? I thought all the praise for Ken Whisenhunt in San Diego guaranteed the Titans would turn it around in short order but they keep finding ways to lose. That offense should be better and that defense isn’t doing enough even though they’ve got one of the better defensive minds on staff. Oh well…what am I upset about anyway? The division was giftwrapped for Andrew Luck from the beginning so expecting any of the other teams (Houston & Jacksonville included) to be any competition was foolish on my part.
- The Jets haven’t reached pitiful status yet but they surely put up a Patriots vs Kansas City type of performance versus the Chargers Sunday. There are a few problems for them (lack of talent @ WR and in the secondary, spotty QB play and uninspired play-calling) which affect the few things they can do right (defend the run and running the ball..) As we saw this weekend, Mike Vick will NOT be the savior he was in Philadelphia, so Jets fans better hope things get better for them. I can easily see them losing their next 5 games. EASILY. And firing Rex Ryan will not turn this thing around. They might as well let him ride the year out while scouring the waivers and practice squads for talent.
- LOL @ Jim Caldwell’s Lions. How a 3-2 team that has so much going for it can find a way to lose to a Kyle Orton-led Buffalo Bills team is baffling. I know Jim Schwartz laughed his head off @ each missed FG and each injured player limping off the field. We’ll see how Detroit looks going forward…all that talent that’s on paper isn’t on the field like we all thought. Can Caldwell scheme these guys up and get them on the right track?
- Seattle was looking forward to Dallas and mailed that 2nd half in versus Washington but can we get some more praise on Russell Wilson’s (Proud owner in the BTFL!) plate? He doesn’t have the stats of the elite passers of our days but he rarely makes bad throws, can do you dirty in and out of the pocket and has put some plays on film this season that are top ten worthy…Every team that needed a QB and passed on him should hang their heads very low like sweet chariots but we have to admit that the combination of Russell, Pete Carroll and Darrell Bevell (the offensive co-ordinator) is a top trio in this league. But keep your eyes to the horizon for Seattle…Marshawn won’t be back because Seattle won’t pay him with Russell deserving a raise. Plus the Seahawks have to let a few other top talents walk in the offseason because they’ve maximized their value with stellar play on the field…Reloading that roster is a concern for next season and beyond. For now, let’s enjoy Russell and what he does for the rest of the season.
- …I’m all for NFL stars getting work after their careers are done but I need these former player commentators that go on network TV or the NFL Network to get some INTENSIVE training behind the scenes. Whatever it takes…public speaking, English classes, speech therapy, an emphasis on diction and pronunciation..SOMETHING. It’s almost like the networks are setting these guys up for failure! So you’re saying I’ve got to get my post game commentary/analysis/highlight breakdowns late on Sunday night from LaDainian Tomlinson and Michael Irvin, who are NOTORIOUS for butchering standard English?
I’m almost at a point now when I think back to the days of Emmitt Smith and wonder was he really that bad? (Spoiler: He was..)
- Jacksonville is getting more pub for its pool and its mascot than the product on the field…smh. Blake Bortles and Gus Bradley are a start but they need more and more talent on that roster to be relevant. Byron Leftwich must be rolling over in his grave…
And like the Oregon Ducks chances at winning the National Championship, I’m done…
The Commish
Another week, another slew of NFL games that deserve commentary for stuff on and off the field….Let’s dive right in, shall we?
- Saints decided to run a fake punt with Thomas Morstead down 14 while on the comeback trail….
New Orleans was getting their butts handed to them by the Dallas Cowboys, of all teams…So I can’t say I understand stalling the comeback attempt by calling a fake punt that as obvious as grey hair on Rob Ryan’s head. You want to make a comeback? You put the ball in Drew Brees’ hand, put Jimmy Graham, Brandin Cooks and Marques Colston out on pass routes, have Pierre Thomas in to block and you make it work, no matter the down or the distance….Let me find out Sean Payton’s out here making 2011 Jason Garrett type decisions on the sidelines…Is the world still on it’s axis?
- Please help me understand how Michael Vick makes the Jets better? I understand Vick at his best is a wonderful memory, but that man is not currently employed by the New York football Jets. The man who is currently employed by the Jets is an injury-prone mobile QB with a pretty thrown ball, spotty accuracy and hamstrings made out of Twizzlers. He might make the highlights look good after losses but how will his insertion into the lineup lead to wins? Have you seen their upcoming schedule? @SD, home to DEN, @ NE, home vs BUF, @ KC and home vs PIT before a bye…If one incorporates this past week’s results, the Charger, Bronco and Chief games are clear losses. Clear. New England is a toss up. Pittsburgh looks to have too much firepower on offense to lose and who knows how Buffalo responds to Kyle Orton?…Stop the madness. Let Geno work through the growing pains of being a 2nd year QB. But people need to start questioning some other things in regard to the Jets. Woody Johnson sitting on 21.2 million bucks when some money could’ve been used on some skill players? Could Marty Morninhweg be @ fault, considering no QB has blossomed under his tutelage? Rex Ryan has developed how many offensive stars via the draft? ZERO?
- Pittsburgh losing to the Buccaneers? Tomlin definitely got caught in a letdown game. No ifs, ands or buts about it. Tomlin didn’t respect the potential effort of the team coming into Pittsburgh to play his Steelers. The offense, for the most part, showed up on the stat sheet but the defense is still too spotty to be trusted at this point in the season. ..One of my pet peeves with NFL teams is playing super conservative when up late in a game and Pittsburgh did this on Sunday. When up by any amount of points and you need a 1st down to ice the game, PASSING IS AN OPTION! What a novel concept! I understand being close to your own goal line, the potential disaster of a pick in that situation but there are dozens of high percentage pass plays that you can call that can get you small chunks of yardage. 3 straight runs and a punt do not a drive make! ESPECIALLY when the Tampa Bay defense KNOWS that’s what you’re doing! Switch it up people! Running right into the backs of your offensive line to burn clock and play safe cost you, Pittsburgh, and this might be that loss that keeps you out of playoff contention!
- Steve Smith was more lucky than good vs his old team…actually MOSTLY luck. Let’s not get out of control and think Steve really worked his former employers over like Jerry Rice or something. A tipped ball that wasn’t even aimed in his direction and a backpedaled parabola to the back of the end zone does not spell S-K-I-L-L to me. I’ll commend Steve for his ability to translate will and determination into production on the field but that’s about where it stops. Carolina didn’t have anything for the Ravens in the backfield, Cam included, so Steve need not puff up his chest TOO much…but the quotes are too much, though…LOL
- Kirk Cousins was a hot mess last Thursday. He looked good with a clean pocket but was clearly rattled after Niles Paul got his eggs scrambled on a helmet to helmet hit down the seam in the 3rd quarter. He’s a backup QB. Nothing more needs to be said about that. The media spent two weeks building this guy up and trying their hardest to get RGIII out of town but sometimes the best defense to the haters is to not even play. Cousins reminded many of Rex Grossman and that’s not who you want to remind ANYONE of. ANYONE.
- The Patriots whipping @ the hands of Wally the Walrus and those pesky Kansas City Chiefs is more an indictment on the “Patriot Way” than Tom Brady falling off of a cliff, talent wise. Robert Kraft and Bill Belichick got cocky in believing that Tom would see them through regardless of personnel and he can’t do it that way consistently anymore. At his worst, you get a game like Monday night, where no one looks open, the line is leaking like a cracked coffee mug and it all looks like a dumpster fire the closer you look at it…..But Bill and Bob needs to be held accountable for their consistent draft day misses and their inability to groom offensive talent as well spend money for anybody over the age of 30 @ the WR position. Randy Moss leaving didn’t help. Letting Welker go didn’t help. Letting Brandon Lloyd go didn’t help. Trading Mankins didn’t help. Hernandez was an unfortunate situation but there’s got to be more bullets in the chamber after he got let go. Chad Johnson was a dice roll that didn’t pan out. Relying on a hobbled Gronkowski and super scrappy Julian Edelman isn’t gonna cut it against top talent. It might get New England through the AFC East because…its the AFC Least…but if Denver, San Diego or Kansas City come to town again….it’s goodnight Irene. And I don’t even KNOW an Irene….So somethings have to change in New England going forward…Maybe the offensive co-ordinator has to tweak some things on his end but a lot of change has to come from GM Belichick…He can’t rely on smoke, mirrors, mystique and videotape to get wins anymore. You need talent.
- Hussain Abdullah’s penalty for this:
was unnecessary but I understood why the refs through the flag…they saw the slide and chucked that yellow but once Abdullah’s helmet hit the turf…they knew they done effed up now (like Bill Duke said.)
- Antonio, what is this dance and why can I not stop laughing at it on repeat? https://vine.co/v/OZUODa1HZX3
- Last but not least, I didn’t put a commentary up last week because of browser crashes and a few other unfortunate events but you know I couldn’t let this slide even if I wanted to…This stands up a week later…
CAM NEWTON, WTF IS YOU WEARING?
And on that fashion faux-pas, I’m like Amber Rose and Wiz Khalifa’s marriage…done here
The Commish
Father of the Year or nah?…
SMH…
Oh Adrian
- Minnesota, after stumbling all over themselves, did what they needed to do to keep the hounds at bay. Indefinite suspension until this situation is resolved is fine by me.
- Adrian went over the line with the discipline. His kid’s legs looked like Nathan’s hotdogs fresh off of a Foreman grill! I doubt the child’s a saint and may have found a way to get on Peterson’s last nerve where pushing a sibling off of a video game represented the proverbial last straw but the end result with the switch wasn’t the answer.
- I understand Adrian’s upbringing involved the same type of treatment so he’s only doing what he knows but that kind of cycle needs to be broken. It’s not going to do the kid any good in the future. I don’t think he’s a child abuser…I just think he’s only doing to others what was done to him because it’s all he knows. Adrian’s got to learn to do more to discipline his children and he’s got to learn it fast or he won’t be earning a paycheck in this league or any league for that matter. His image and his earning potential are on thin ice right now. Nike’s pulled their jerseys from stores in the area and he’s lost an endorsement or two…Pulling things together and showing that he’s on the path to recovery will get him back in everyone’s good graces soon enough but they’re going to need time to forgive and/or forget.
- I see you, Minnesota Vikings organization. You understand that Adrian is the straw that stirs your drink. He is Minnesota. And you don’t want to Ray Rice Adrian (aka terminate his contract and be left with little to nothing that’s proven @ the RB spot) so you put him in a safe zone to keep the enraged public, the nervous sponsors and the petrified NFL in a holding pattern. But you’re only covering your pockets so certain companies and the fans don’t take the money that they put in it there back out. A one-week deactivation wasn’t enough so now the team has to take a few more losses that weren’t intended but that’s the price they’ve got to pay.
- I was surprised to see the amount of support Ray Rice got from the Baltimore locals, especially the women, considering the evidence in play. Not saying they shouldn’t be behind someone from their city that they grew attached to…just an interesting circumstance is all.
- Buffalo, Houston and Arizona are undefeated. All surprising outcomes but they won’t stay that way for too much longer. The Texans have the best shot at staying on the proper side of .500 for longer, considering their division but let’s see how the games play out….like the NY Lottery motto says, ” Hey, you never know!”
- So apparently LeSean McCoy left a .20 cent tip at PYT in Philly because he felt the service was just that atrocious while PYT contends that they gave him nothing but the best service possible and that LeSean and his homies were giant pricks upon arrival. Classic case of he said/they said….but it doesn’t look good for McCoy dropping two dimes as a tip.. I understand he wanted to make a point but but dropping enough money for the bottom of a fountain VIA the credit card wasn’t the way to do it. Give 15% and dip.
- I have to say I liked what I saw from the Jets offense versus the Packers. Going for it on 4th down early in the game, taking shots and playing with physicality and confidence. Rex’s team has got “it”, which will help them compete for most of the season but they can’t afford injury or boneheaded timeout calls from the offensive coordinator. Yeah, Sheldon Richardson took the heat for it but Marty shouldn’t be calling a timeout @ all. What a maroon…
- The New York Giants are a comedy of errors on offense right now. Even when Eli plays well for stretches, his receivers let him down. Even Rashad Jennings, who didn’t fumble once all of last year, fell onto the grass and fumbled the ball untouched. There’s a hex in Coughlin’s camp and they need somebody to clear out the bad juju. Outside of Larry Donnell, what’s really popping for the G-Men?
And please get Ben McAdoo to a stylist. Your boy looks like he’s charting stats for a high school soccer game. He looks like he’s waiting for his car from an underground garage out in suburbam New Jersey. He looks like he’s shopping at a yard sale for microscopes and scrap metal for the robot he’s building in his garage…or looking at the Home Depot circular to see if there’s a sale on LED lights and plant mulch.
- Ray Rice is appealing his indefinite suspension because of Double Jeopardy?
Just go sit down for a year, Ray. Please. Getting back on the field via a loophole will definitely have people hating you even more. If you need to see advice on this, please look at the last year and change that Ryan Braun went through…
- The NFL added four women to help with the domestic violence policies. Let’s just say that’s long overdue….What I find interesting is that these four ladies got added to the “team” very soon after the Adrian Peterson situation happened and not when the Ray Rice situation happened. To me, it feels like the women got called in for the children and not for themselves…if you catch my drift.
- I feel bad about Charles Tillman’s torn tricep that put him on injured reserve the other day. It’s an unfortunate injury to a pretty good cornerback talent. I never considered him a “shutdown” corner or anything, but he was a good #1, a fixture for the dominant defesnes in Chicago for the past decade and he was going to play an important role for the Bears this season. The injury bug tends to bite a lot harder when you get on in years and Charles may have been bitten for the last time.
- What is all this talk about the Colts taking the ball out of Andrew Luck’s hands late in games? That’s not even the main problem for them, to be honest. Their biggest issue is their offensive coordinator’s playcalling. For a guy named Pep, a lot of his plays tend to give me the opposite of pep. Drowsiness, heavy eyelids, and a case of the snores. Smashing Trent Richardson into a poorly blocked spot in the line where there’s no hole should not be considered an offense. What Pep should do is let Luck start winging from the 1st quarter and use that snooze-worthy run game to kill clock in the 4th quarter when they have an insurmountable lead…
- Robert Griffin dislocated his ankle in an ugly fashion this past Sunday and Kirk Cousins came in to light up the hapless Jaguars for the remaining 3 and 1/2 quarters. Another unfortunate injury for Robert that prevents him from getting more comfortable with the new offense…but the bigger issue may be that there’s a potential McNabb/Vick situation brewing in DC. One could say this has been brewing in the background ever since Washington drafted Kirk the same year they drafted Robert and I would not disagree one bit. Kirk’s been the 2nd stringer for years now but has been hyped up like a fan favorite fourth outfielder in baseball: that guy who has a ton of talent but doesn’t start all the time because the people ahead of him are considered to be better but whenever they get the chance to play, they perform and the crowd loves them for it….Kirk’s got some Andy Dalton in him. That’s why Jay Gruden likes him more than RG3, in my opinion. Kirk, like Andy, can spread the ball around and run the offense ,as it’s drawn up, from the pocket. Robert’s better running an offense that takes advantage of his speed and running ability…but I don’t think that’ll happen in DC for the foreseeable future. Should be an interesting few weeks going forward….if Kirk plays well, does RG3 lose his job? Was that sacrifice all for naught?
And with that, another week of commentary is on file. Enjoy week 3 and I’ll be back next week with more!
The Commish
Week 1 is in the books and a few things have gone down since my last commentary. Let me load up a clip and shoot these bullets!
- Josh Gordon is now selling cars in Ohio….Sarchione Auto group in Randolph, Ohio…Not sure how I feel about that. On one hand, I’m happy he’s doing something productive with his days as well as doing some community service work for the dealership, which definitely earns him some “brownie points” with whoever needs them…but I also feel this Auto Group is profiting from the spectacle as best they can, which mkaes me a little sad.
- Michael Sam made the Cowboys practice squad…Congrats to him on getting onto a team, period. I had my doubts he’d get added but Dallas definitely needs what he provides and I’m certain that he’ll be on the field @ some point this season due to the wear and tear of the season…
I’m glad he was able to get there on his own two…his own merits…wait…are you telling me NFL officials intervened? That they didn’t let this happen naturally and gently prodded this process along from the comfort of their air conditioned offices and desks and power strips?
This season continues to be a PR nightmare for the NFL.
- I heard a wild rumor that Carolina’s insistence on keeping Cam Newton’s supporting cast as underwhelming as possible is a ploy to keep his costs down when free agency rolls around (since stats play such a large role in how much one gets paid) …I think that’s a bit of a stretch (and most likely speculation) but it’s not out of the realm of possibility. I think Carolina’s sins of overpaying DeAngelo Williams and Jonathan Stewart (in regard to their salary cap) and shelling out top dollar to keep their defense relevant led to the loss of top flight talent for Cam Newton to throw to. But if the Panthers low ball Cam in the coming months when negotiations take place, the rumor turned out to be truth…
- Trent Richardson – the rise and supreme fall….I’m not saying he was ever supreme talent to begin with. But can someone explain to me how the Trent Richardson from Alabama is currently the Trent Richardson on the Colts? Is it that he performs better with elite blocking talent in front of him? Did he really love Cleveland that much that he’s been depressed ever since getting traded? Is it mental? I’d really like to know because of reasons….
- Champ Bailey is out of work. I do not expect that to be the case for too much longer.
- Former Steelers CB DeShea Townsend really needs to work on background checks for the people he rents his properties to…I can’t even recap the tomfoolery well enough to cover all the angles. Linkage here and here .
- Considering the way the San Francisco 49ers came out and played on Sunday afternoon, I’d like to believe those reports of Harbaugh losing the locker room were a bit overblown.
- Antonio Brown’s flying kick to Spencer Lanning, the Cleveland Browns punter’s head was wild.. As funny as it was upon first viewing (and all subsequent viewings TBH), I’m still expecting Antonio to get a decent sized fine and a possible suspension. Keyword: POSSIBLE. That can’t fly in the NFL because that would set one hell of a bad precedent, especially with the league trying to show how safe football is to the younger generations. Spencer Lanning should be grateful punters get helmets.
- Watching Tony Romo vs SF and Eli Manning vs. DET was like watching The Hangover II on DVD on repeat. Very unpleasant and the same old story in new surroundings.
- So you’re telling me that Jerry Jones is being sued and possibly extorted by a possible escort/confirmed former exotic dancer for a wild night back in 2009 that involved fellatio, plenty of inappropriate sexual touching on Jerry’s part, and some interesting photographs?
HOW BOUT THEM COWBOYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (this can only get worse before it gets better…)
- Andrew Luck may have the swag of Amish barnbuilder but the man can play some football.
- Josh Gordon and Wes Welker might be back on the field if they overhaul the drug program but what new problems may arise now that they’re checking for HGH? A lot of other dudes might definitely be getting the boot….Peyton, I know you got some HGH residue in your spinal column RIGHT NOW!!!! That’s why you broke that record last season…Explains SO MUCH!!!
- Another interesting thing that may only interest me is….why are people so quick to overhaul the drug policy now that Wes Welker got popped for MDMA? When Josh Gordon got busted, it was more like “Aw, let the kid rot!!”…once Wes Welker caught that L, now we’re in meetings and writing notes on legal pads and voting on ish?
- Ray Rice gets his own post. A quick bullet doesn’t even begin to talk about that situation..
And I’m all through for Week 1. See you in roughly seven days!
The Commish
- Wes Welker suspended for 4 games for violating the league’s policy on performance enhancing substances? Tripping off that MDMA cut with them amphetamines? Hanging out with French and the Coke Boyz? Say it ain’t so, Wes!!! Is that where he gets all his scrap, grit and pluck? Probably so….All jokes aside, it’s probably best if he sits out four weeks to let the gray matter unscramble. Peyton Manning isn’t going anywhere anytime soon and those hits over the middle from mean safeties with an appetite for collisions will be there to light him up in Week 5.
- Kyle Orton found a way to turn retirement into a come up. He was recently riding the pine for the perennially mediocre Dallas Cowboys, making roughly 3 something million simoleons…but wanted no part of that nonsense. So he tells Dallas he’s going to hang up his cleats and does so for about two months….The Buffalo Bills call up with a 2 yr deal worth 11 mil and Kyle’s on the 1st thing smoking to Orchard Park. I know Dallas is stuck in a loop like a skipping CD but Buffalo’s definitely no better a destination if winning is the final goal. If getting paid’s the main goal, then by all means, Kyle, get your bread. But please understand, wins will be low like the Family Matters…
- Alex Smith just signed an extension with the Kansas City Chiefs..4 years, 68 million with 45 million guaranteed to be paid out in the first two years. THIRTY MIL now, FIFTEEN MIL, next season. Yet Jamaal Charles gets 8.3 guaranteed on an extension? I’m not understanding these financial terms, man…not at all. I’m all for anyone getting paid in the NFL considering no contract is guaranteed and the owners are swimming in money like Scrooge McDuck but fairness is key. Sometimes I think these position players just don’t get the benefits for what effort they put forth on the field. Ask Jimmy Graham ALL about that…
- J.J. Watt got a 6 year, 100 million dollar extension the other day and I still feel he’s underpaid. He was a 1st round draft pick out of Wisconsin but if you saw 3 years of dominance out of him when he first got drafted, I need the numbers for Powerball tomorrow STAT. He’s a beast on the defensive line, hilarious in commercials and is one of the 10 best players in the league @ any position…and that’s why he got paid.
- Michael Sam was released by the St. Louis Rams and is currently looking for work anywhere in the NFL, turning down an open opportunity to get on the field in the CFL. I think there are going to be a lot of conversations in team offices across the country about Mike and I wonder who’s going to take a shot on adding him to their practice squad. (A trip to anyone’s 53 man roster is a major stretch right now..). He proved he can play in this league as a sub package rusher throughout the preseason but lacks special teams versatility, which would help him immensely. Rumors have it that the Cowboys are in need of some defensive end help but will the stupid need to report on Sam’s every move hinder his chances at getting employed? We shall see….Times like these are why I wish he hadn’t made his sexual preference public until after he was on a team’s roster but hey, it was his plan.
- Josh Gordon’s been suspended for the 2014 season, with a shot @ getting reinstated by training camp of next year. But there’s talk Josh wants to sue the NFL, get the suspension lifted while his case is being deliberated and play for Cleveland for the time being.
As much as I am on Josh’s side about the rules being too strict, a lawsuit is not in his best interest right now. If Josh has kept his nose clean (and his lungs) from day one and this was his first offense, I could see a lawsuit as an option. But he came into the league via the supplemental draft under sketchy circumstances, got suspended last season for 2 games over some “lean” and now another positive test got him the book tossed @ his upper torso and neck region. Fall back, get your act intact, stay to the shadows and just stay in relative shape for next season. The talent is there, teams still want him and the chance to turn it all around is still there. Getting stats and footage on tape for 2014 should be the last thing he should be worried about.
But as a source close to the Commish said “He shouldn’t waste his money on a lawsuit…he should save his money for that girl he’s been seeing. “
- Le’Veon Bell and LeGarrette Blount were pulled over by police on August 20th and Bell got arrested whilst riding around with 20 grams of Mary Jane in the car. What a way to make an impression with the new team, LeGarrette! Lighting up your last name and getting the starting RB in trouble in the process? SMH. One can be assured that while any punishment from the league or the law hasn’t come down yet, Mike Tomlin will have his own way of making these guys suffer. Extra playing time in a preseason game was just the beginning. I’m expecting LOTS of extra time spent in practice running and doing plenty of cardio work…Mike will definitely help them with their lung capacity…
That’s all the commentary for the week. No Kate Upton .gif to finish things off this week out of respect for her leaked nudes with Justin Verlander….Tip out some brew from your 40s or bottled water as tribute…
The Commish