This isn’t going to get into every aspect of every team, considering I haven’t seen every snap of every game so far.
But considering all the information I’ve ingested and processed over these past 4 weeks, I AM qualified to leave commentary on what i THINK about these teams in the form of YouTube links, animated GIFs, photos and the written word….
- This EJ Manuel character might not be so bad after all….They definitely need more imagination when it comes to the play calling. A lot of these plays are too safe and too by the book. Watching them run 3 straight run plays late in the game when they’re only up 3 points will have me and your fan base SCREAMING @ the top of their lungs!…Defense isn’t too bad but not great. Dealing with injuries, yes….but that Kiko Alonso is a stud LB.
- They’ve made some strides this season, especially on defense. I thought their offseason spending bonanza would have them fall flat on their face but that hasn’t been the case…..Please tell the media to cease with the Dan Marino comparisons for Ryan Tannehill. He’s closer to Guy Finkel than Dan Marino…Lamar Miller>>>>>>>>Daniel Thomas. The sooner the coaching staff sees that, the better the Dolphins will be on offense…3-1 is a good start but that shellacking by the Saints shows how much farther they have to go..
New England Patriots
- It has not been pretty but they are undefeated so far. Brady has made it work with an unknown WR group and subpar production from Ridley and the run game. Them having this record is because of total team effort. Yes. 3 of the 4 teams they played weren’t exactly world beaters but the Pats aren’t running @ top capacity either. Belichick and his coaches are doing some good work gameplanning these opponents and that mystique about them costs some of their opponents from jump because they’re still afraid of New England….Watch that body language, Tom Terrific….
New York Jets
- This team is a roller coaster ride. They should be 1-3 if not for Lavonte David’s miscue in the first game, and they’re a few drives away from 0-4….the defense is better up front and Cromartie is still good but they surely miss LaRon Landry’s physicality from the back end….Chris Ivory/Mike Goodson? What was the point of bringing them in? Bilal Powell all day….Geno Smith may some talent, especially throwing the ball downfield, but this game will do whatever it can to balance that smugness he has inside. You’ll see. ..Stephen Hill has to be one of the most maddening WRs to come along in a LONG time….
- Bombed by the Broncos, ground out some wins vs. CLE and HOU and then a loss to BUF?..Post Super-Bowl malaise? Is it the free agent exodus? Or are they just not as good as we thought?…Flacco is not worth his weight in Mighty Wings….Run game: stressful. That defense is still stout up front but they lack that shutdown presence on the back end and they are getting exposed like a hospital gown….Also might want to look into a new offensive co-ordinator because Caldwell may have run out of fairy potions and pixie dust….Torrey Smith is the only bright spot on offense…Jacoby, you eat your peas. You don’t get bonked on the noggin by them….
- Lots of Hard Knocks this season so far…Lost a close one week 1, beat PIT and GB(which are games they historically lose), but then lose to Cleveland….C’mon Marvin!….. The secondary, especially the safeties, need to tighten things up… .Giovani Bernard gives this offense a lot of punch and Eifert will definitely turn into a quality contributor sooner than later..This team has a lot of talent on offense AND defense but this team will only go as far as Andy Dalton’s Red Rifle can take them…can’t always force the ball to AJ Green…
- Jim Brown must be jumping up and down in his casket….oh wait, he’s not dead? WHOOPS!….Thought to be tanking by many (including the author), they’ve improbably won 2 in a row with Brian Hoyer @ the helm and no real RB threat….Stupefying…Josh Gordon and Jordan Cameron are building blocks for any team. Very talented duo….That defense is very underrated. joe Haden is a shutdown corner and they are some tough mofos across the board. The bloom may fall off the rose in the next 4 weeks but right now? They’re looking good.
- 0-4. Wow. Mike Tomlin has his work cut out for him. There’s only so much that human will can do for a team. All that mental toughness and Pittsburgh tradition don’t mean squat if you don’t have enough talent. Yes, I understand there were injuries but I don’t think enough talent was brought in via free agency for them to compete if injuries came along. Run game: Stressful (although Le’Veon may turn that around soon enough) and Big Ben walks that fine line that Brett Favre walked during his career…Pull a play out of your hat, you’re revered and celebrated. Turn the ball over and you don’t get slaughtered as you should because of the Super Bowl ring defense….Got it….
- Matt Schaub jerseys are being burned in the parking lot. I’m getting the feeling that they don’t like this guy!…The run game always seems to show up more versus tougher opponents…Dunno why that is…DeAndre Hopkins is looking like that 2nd receiver and Garrett Graham is looking like that 2nd TE option…Andre Johnson is still a beast who is allergic to touchdowns…For all the talk of how good the DEF is, they’ve given up 28, 24 and 23 pts in 3 of 4 weeks….I think Houston and Atlanta are kindred spirits in the NFL. They’re like impotent lovers..Both will get you hot and bothered but they can’t finish
- They’ve won the games they needed to win and even won a game they weren’t expected to (vs. SF). Bodes well for them going forward . These next four games will really tell the story for this team (vs SEA, SD, DEN, HOU) …Andrew Luck has been as advertised. Gets points with his arm and his legs behind a subpar offensive line…The league wants to turn this guy into a star but he’s too goofy/corny to make that happen…They have to hope Trent Richardson is the answer. They gave up a lot to get him….Reggie Wayne has not aged. I think he’s 25 years old still…A no name defense has given up 10 points in its last 2 games….Vinatieri is still in the league? Wow…
No one expected them to be competitive even with talented players like Cecil Shorts and Maurice Jones-Drew on the roster on offense but I’d rather watch Mos Def’s Guantanamo Bay video on loop than watch this team with Blaine Gabbert @ the helm. I don’t doubt he has the ability to throw a football in a drill and maybe he looked real good @ Mizzou but in the NFL, I haven’t seen the ability to move the ball up and down the field consistently. Can he only operate in a spread offense?…#FreeChadHenne…#TankasaurusRex
- 3-1 on the season but that Locker injury will set them back and it happened @ the worst possible time (KC, SEA and SF on the upcoming sched)…The offense didn’t really take too many chances and I normally rip teams for that but Locker needs the structure. TEN has good skill positions so it must be frustrating to see them not put up more points….That defense is MUCH better than expected. I wonder how much of it is on Gregg Williams. I also wonder if there’s a new bounty board under Bud Adams watch…#justsaying
- The defense has been just okay minus Bailey and Von Miler but it hasn’t mattered. Peyton and the crew haven’t let it matter. Pass Game: Expert level….Welker’s slid right in and become the underneath guy on this team. Orange Julius is the new TE threat in the league and even with a 3-headed RB committee, this offense is ROLLING. If they stay healthy, I don’t see who’ll beat them. Maybe Kansas City one of the two times they play? And that’s no guarantee..#Undefeated?…..They out here putting numbers on the board..
Kansas City Chiefs
- Captain Checkdown and Wally Walrus are 4-0. GO FIGURE…That defense is FOR REAL. Edge pressure, good corners and safeties and those LBs are tough man. Lots of talent there….A decidedly average offense is making it work with a lot of short stuff over the middle and dump-offs to the RBs. For the moment, they can’t be stopped…If you can name the starting TE right now without consulting an internet website, give yourself a pat on the back…
- McFadden is injured? How is that possible? He’s an IRON MAN!
Whoops….back to the team….Terrelle Pryor hasn’t looked half bad for a guy who just learned how to throw the ball this season….The offense also moved the ball well when he was in there. Once Matt Flynn showed up….
San Diego Chargers
- Surprise team to me for the entire AFC. After week 1’s collapse, we all figured they’d be the same ole Chargers but they exorcised those Schottenheimer/Norval Turner demons the following week by clipping the Eagles’ wings on a short week. They are a bit up and down and that’s to be expected with that porous a defense (now down their best pass rusher for possibly the season) but the offense is performing admirably. Remember the HC was the guy who helped turn Tebow into something functional and spent a season with Peyton Manning tweaking that offense…so…let’s not be so shocked @ what we’re seeing. They’ve got a shot @ getting to 5-6 wins over this next 4 game stretch…
- Can’t get a bead on this team @ all. Talent all over the offense, offensive line looks much improved and Romomentum is @ an all time high…but the defense keeps giving up the goods and they get sprayed
- Dez Bryant is a beast. Also true: The sky is blue….I’m not sure why the Cowboys insist on tossing in tons of rookie reps when the vets are healthy. I can understand a sprinkling in but these guys are getting way too many reps!…Miles Austin’s hamstrings are made of Big League Chew….That DAL defense flies around but if they don’t get turnovers, they’re giving up points….DeMarcus Ware just might be back….I think Jason Garrett looks better as just a head coach. The stress seems to be off his shoulders….Just because DAL is first in the league does not give them the crown just yet. Right when you think this team has turned the corner, they pull the rug right out fron underneath ya….
New York Giants
- No run game, offensive line is basura, Eli throwing deep balls to ghosts of successes past and a subpar defense…Medium Sean made a song about these guys….make that motherfcuking Hammertime
- Chip Kelly and his defensive chops is getting exposed like a nudist colony with a live web feed…Can the Eagles coach avoid what Steve Spurrier and Nick Saban got hit with? (HINT: THE AXE)….I will say Mike Vick has never looked better on a football field from the pocket. If he had this offense back in Atlanta, he would’ve never gone to jail! and would’ve been in the discussion for the best QB ever…I will say that this team needs more production from the other receivers. DeSean can only do so much. Maclin in this offense would’ve made this offense really go hyperspeed….Chip needs to understand that time of possession is very important. This isn’t the Greatest Show on Turf, who could deal with turnovers because they could easily get the points back due to depth and talent on the roster….Running some time of the clock keeps the defense off the field and THAT is a good thing…
- With their win this Sunday, the Redskins are now tied for 2nd place…#NFCLEAST….RG3 looks a little better and that’s due to the OC finally running the rock. Once the Skins get that balance back on O, they should climb their way out of the cellar….ENTIRE DEFENSE GAME:SUPER STRESSFUL….Whether it was due to financial constraints or overall lack of scouting, this defense is going to be Swiss cheese after being shot @ by an UZI for the rest of the season. Orakpo and Kerrigan can only do so much. SMH….
- Check it down, Jay. It’s not that hard. You’ve got receiving threats all over the field!…Marc Trestman looks like he should be teaching sophomore Chemistry class, not coaching football….This team may not really miss Urlacher on the field but they might miss him in the locker room….Peanut Tillman is a very good corner but if he’s injured and not able to punch balls out of the grasp of WRs and RB’s, this team loses a lot of its edge….Matt Forte must love being on the edges and out in space and not run right up the middle like Mike Tice had him…I will admit the Bears won some games this season they don’t normally win. We’ll see how they do down the line (NO, NYG, WAS, GB, DET, BAL)
- Reggie! Reggie! Reggie! Methinks he’s found a home. Reminds me of his work down in New Orleans except they’re actually giving him some real run plays….Staffy is doing okay. Walking that thin line between stardom and ridicule but he’s doing okay….Calvin, talk to Nike about those commercials with Puffy in them. No bueno, holmes….The defense always feels like it should be better than it is but it never is. I wonder why that is….Tell Nate Burleson that they do have delivery. And if you need 2 pizzas @ 2AM, get frozen from the 24 hr grocery store…..
Green Bay Packers
- They needed that bye something fierce…RB injuries all over the roster. If they dig up Cedric Benson’s dead body, I’ll pass out…AR12 is still slinging that water weight out there. If you disagree, please head to your local optometrist for an exhaustive checkup…Jordy Nelson is the closest thing we have to Cris Carter in this league. The back shoulder, sideline catches are things of beauty and he’s #1 @ it….Tramon Williams is not a #1 CB….Clay Matthews is okay but is he really worthy of all this stardom? Is he as good as JJ Watt? Does he affect the game as much? Can’t say he does….Dom Capers better clean up the back end like a barber or Green Bay is going to have all the pressure on Mr. Discount DoubleCheck
- Adrian Peterson is a beast. Also true: Water is wet…..Ponder is not the answer. Joe Webb, who became a full time WR this season, is a better option @ QB than Ponder…Matt Cassel might be the better option but the question is…do the Vikes really want to win too many games or do they just want to be competitive for the fan base?…Does Greg Jennings have to put the team on his back?…..Jerome Simpson…who knew?….I feel bad for Kyle Rudolph…CB Coverage skills: STRESSFUL…Jared Allen can only do so much…
- I think Houston and Atlanta are kindred spirits in the NFL. They’re like impotent lovers..Both will get you hot and bothered but they can’t finish…I think the world of Julio Jones and Roddy White and I actually like the team with the two headed monster @ RB (Jacquizz and Jason)…Matty Ice sure can pile up those numbers but that offensive imagination is stuck in neutral. There are other offensive players on the team other than Tony G, Julio and Roddy…There’s a reason all their games are close and it doesn’t always fall on the defense, that’s lacking talent due to injury and ineffective play. The offensive strategy, especially in the red zone, lacks variety and until they show something different, they’ll always be a coulda-woulda-shoulda type of team. That New England game was a huge eye-opener….
- Currently 2nd in the NFC South, fresh off of a lashing of the NY Giants…Are they the team that beat NY handily with that deep threat, short pass game, runs for the QB and rushing attempts for the RBs on the roster or are they the team that looked tight as skinny jeans on Rick Ross vs Seattle and Buffalo? Let me know!
New Orleans Saints
- These guys are beasts
- Drew Brees is dropping dimes, Jumbo Jimbo Graham is proving to be a major weapon down the seams and Marques Colston is still Marques Colston…..Run game kinda stressful but it doesn’t matter with that short pass game w/ Sproles and Pierre Thomas….Rob Ryan has had a major effect on the defense. They may not have the talent but the effort and the schemes are getting turnovers by the handful….They did struggle early but have turned it on the past couple weeks…Crown of the NFC South 4 games in..
Tampa Bay Buccaneers
- This has the look of a dumpster fire. Greg Schiano is messing with continuity but then again, Josh Freeman’s numbers have taken a tumble since last last year (when he cost me a fantasy game or two). Turning to Glennon might be their only option going forward…and with them going to their bye after starting 0-4, they’ve got a shot to turn the pirate ship around…That defense is downright ferocious. Dashon Goldson is knocking fools out left and right, Revis Island is still beastly and that front 7 can really put the pressure on you. Teams won’t blow TB out going forward….
- Surprisingly 2-2…the two wins came under dubious distinction but a win’s a win. Let’s see how they do in the next 4 gms (CAR, SF, SEA, ATL)…Run Game:Stressful….Carson’s doing most of the heavy lifting, finding his 3 WRs and the occasional back out of the backfield…The defense is not bad @ all. Not the beasts they were the past couple weeks but with Washington coming back from suspension, maybe they improve?
San Francisco 49ers
- Wins cure all and that win over STL in Week 4 really cleans up an uneven early season….They will be tested. No one feels sorry for them with all their injured players on both sides of the ball and their best pass rusher in rehab. They’ll continue to get people’s best foot forward (outside of STL) and they can’t sit back and relax…Colin Kaepernick looked like a beast last season because he could do more than Alex Smith within the context of the offense. Now they have him doing exactly what Alex Smith did last season #IRONY….Navorro Bowman >> Patrick Willis and it’s not even close….Eric Reid is a friggin tank…
- Total team effort. When the offense isn’t firing on all cylinders, the defense picks it up. When the defense gives up ground, Russell Wilson and Co. get those points. No clear cut WR1, no TE @ all, injuries up and down the offensive line…and all they do is win like DJ Khaled in a screaming contest
- Plus they’re getting Percy Harvin back later on in the season? They’re looking like early contenders for the Super Bowl…
St. Louis Rams.
- They cannot stop a strong run team, run a finesse offense without the timing and finesse necessary and are employing one of the worst offensive coordinators in the league, who I think got his job because he knew somebody more than him actually knowing offense…GTFOH…